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While this should have been a wake-up call, I spent a good part of my twenties having three, four and ten night stands in an attempt to date people who never should have made it past night one. It was a disaster: the conversation was awkward and the sex was even worse than I remembered. I didn’t really want to see him again, but I thought if I could say we “dated,” I would feel less guilty about sleeping with him (translation: I didn’t want to feel like a slut.) So, after our initial night together, I asked him out on a proper date.
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When I had my first one night stand (with a cute guy I met late one night while studying at the 24 hour library), I was determined to turn the experience into more than it was. As a woman who came of age in the confusing era wedged between the AIDS crisis of the 80s and 90s, where Madonna’s brand of Express Yourself feminism reigned supreme and the proliferation of 2000’s era “hook up culture,” I spent most of my university years trying to negotiate complicated feelings around casual sex.
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In other words, the study once again confirms the age-old belief that women regret having casual sex whereas men regret not having more. Eight in 10 women said they were glad that they had said no to a recent opportunity for casual sex, compared to just 43% of men. However, when it came to declining casual sex, far more men regret saying no to a one night stand than women. Only one in three women said they were happy about their casual sex experience, compared to more than 50% of men. The study that was authored by Norwegian University of Science and Technology’s (NTNU) department of psychology surveyed 263 Norwegians aged between 19 and 37 years old to find out how they felt about recent one night stands. In a world where women’s sexually continues to be under constant scrutiny, I’m unsurprised at these findings. A new predictable scientific study reveals that women are more likely than men to feel guilty after having a one night stand.